Be understanding to your perceived enemies.
Be loyal to your friends.
Be strong enough to face the world each day.
Be weak enough to know you cannot do everything alone.
Be generous to those who need your help
Be loyal to your friends.
Be strong enough to face the world each day.
Be weak enough to know you cannot do everything alone.
Be generous to those who need your help
A young man was having some money problems,
and needed $200 to get his car fixed and roadworthy again.
But had run out of people to borrow from.
So, he calls his parents via the operator, and reverses the charge
and says to his father. "I need to borrow two hundred dollars," he says.
At the other end, his father says,"Sorry, I can't hear you, son, I think there may be a bad line."
The boy shouts, "Two hundred. I need two hundred dollars!"
"Sorry, I still can't hear you clearly," says his father.
The operator cuts in,
"Sorry to butt in, But I can hear him perfectly clearly."
The father says, "Good. YOU send him the money!"
and needed $200 to get his car fixed and roadworthy again.
But had run out of people to borrow from.
So, he calls his parents via the operator, and reverses the charge
and says to his father. "I need to borrow two hundred dollars," he says.
At the other end, his father says,"Sorry, I can't hear you, son, I think there may be a bad line."
The boy shouts, "Two hundred. I need two hundred dollars!"
"Sorry, I still can't hear you clearly," says his father.
The operator cuts in,
"Sorry to butt in, But I can hear him perfectly clearly."
The father says, "Good. YOU send him the money!"
funonthe net.com
Walk In The Jungle
Two friends are walking in the jungle. Suddenly a tiger appears in the distance running toward them. One friend pulls a pair of 'Nikes' out of his bag and quickly puts them on. With a surprised look, the other friend says, "You don't really think you can out run that tiger with those?" "I don't need to out run the tiger", his friend replies, "I just need to run faster than you".
Maths
A little boy was doing his math homework. He said to himself,
"Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six,
that son of a bitch is nine...."
His mother heard what he was saying and gasped,
"What are you doing?"
The little boy answered,
"I'm doing my math homework, Mom."
"And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother
asked.
"Yes," he answered.
Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day,
"What are you teaching my son in math?"
The teacher replied,
"Right now, we are learning addition."
The mother asked,
"And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a
bitch is four?"
After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered,
"What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four.
"Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six,
that son of a bitch is nine...."
His mother heard what he was saying and gasped,
"What are you doing?"
The little boy answered,
"I'm doing my math homework, Mom."
"And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother
asked.
"Yes," he answered.
Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day,
"What are you teaching my son in math?"
The teacher replied,
"Right now, we are learning addition."
The mother asked,
"And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a
bitch is four?"
After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered,
"What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four.
funonthe net
Thoughts of the Day
Patience is the art of concealing your patience ( Anonymous)
It is not the standard of living that is important, but the manner of living ( Anonymous)Happiness is not a station you arrive at, but a manner of traveling. — Margaret Lee Runbeck (1905-1956)
What you see is news, what you know is background, what you feel is opinion. — Lester Markel, American editor (1894-1977)
You can't have a better tomorrow if you are thinking about yesterday all the time. -- Charles F. Kettering
Begin doing what you want to do now. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand -- and melting like a snowflake. -- Marie Beyon Ray
If you want to be successful, it's just this simple: Know what you're doing. Love what you're doing. And believe in what you're doing. -- Will Rogers
You will find meaning in life only if you create it. It is not lying there somewhere behind the bushes, so you can go and you search a little bit and find it. It is not there like a rock that you will find. It is a poetry to be composed, it is a song to be sung, it is a dance to be danced.(unknown)
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